You Don't Want to Live Here!

I was thinking about some of the more disgusting tasks that seem to pop up during my day, and felt it was actually "nasty list" worthy:

1- Worm scooping. Nobody tells you that when you get a pool that it is actually an earthworm suicide emporium. It doesn't happen during the summer, but starting in October, lasting through March, every rainstorm brings out the worms ! (I read this is because they fear flooding). So they BOLT from the earth (as fast as worms can do) and leap right into the pool. Something to do with the slope (worm brains after all)--But let me tell you-- in wet, muddy and warmish Oregon--this means you can easily obtain 50 dead earthworms at the bottom of the pool! Added bonus--drowned earth worms project a ghastly white coloring...

2- Bird foot detanglement. In the spirit of morbidity, let me rehash a more recent event. I thought it was a good idea to cover our garden pond with deer netting--hoping to spare the gold fish from certain death by crow...Instead, the netting soon trapped a careless sparrow--tangling it's leg in the mesh and culminating in a violent drowning... I can't seem to keep anything alive at the fish pond!

3- Chicken butts. As my chickens are bantam versions (smallish silkies) I am always worrying about their 'egg vent'. Those small birds can produce some pretty large eggs-!! And thus are constantly at risk for "egg binding" (think baby stuck in birth canal). Needless to say, one of the ways to help the poor chicken experiencing this phenomena, is to insert some KY Jelly, and lubricate the "vent" and egg. Thankfully, I have yet to experience this task-- but hope to pass it on to my husband...

4- Dog Butts. Another theme here. My elderly dog seems to be having difficulty knowing when she needs to defecate and going potty in a timely fashion. As I was reading online for some advice, one suggestion was to place an ice cube on her fecal vent (ha!). Supposedly, this trick would cause instant poop on command.. All I can think of is the poor dog (who would most likely just wind up with an ice cube frozen to her butt) saying : "wtf are you doing to me now??"
Again, I will suggest this task to hubby, right after he lubes the chickens...